We tend to change ourselves in order to make our partner happy but we often forget that in the process of changing, we change the person our partner actually fell in love with. So there are somethings that you should never change or abandon to make anybody like you better.
Your other relationships:
If your partner cannot respect your other friends or family and does not give regard to them then how will he ever respect you? When two people are in a relationship they start thinking that they have a right over each other and they can banish each other from seeing the people who came in their lives before each other.
This is wrong. Sometimes you cannot let go of some people in your life for your partner because they mean so much to you and at one point in your life they might have played such a great part. If your partner cannot understand that and asks you to cut ties with your other peers then he or she needs to understand that they can never get your true love by isolating you.
Also you can never have a guarantee that this particular person will stick up to you till the end so if you leave all your friends and then break up with him you will literally be alone in the end. No one likes to stay alone and unhappy so if you think that your partner is isolating you or does not respect your other relationships then you need to find someone else because you literally will not get a life again.
Love is all about giving enough space to your partner. a healthy relationship requires enough freedom so that you can enjoy together and alone as well. If your partner gets jealous and possessive every time you go out without him or her or hang out with your friends or family and they have a problem with it then you cannot fix this.
Over possessiveness is not something that can be easily fixed and is a major reason for early break ups. If your partner keeps a check on your phone and inbox and constantly asks for passwords of your social networking sites then clearly they do not trust you enough. Girls tend to fall in depression more in such a situation because they are more emotional than guys and the mere thought that their partner does not trust them enough is too heart breaking for them.
Can you put up with someone who has no regard for your feelings? Mutual understanding is the first thing that is supposed to be there for a relationship to work. if your partner just cares about his or her own feelings all the time and does not show any gesture of love or care then it is almost impossible for a normal person to live with such a human being.
Your feelings are what matter a lot and if he or she cannot have any regard for what you feel every time they say or do something for you then you will end up getting hurt. Feelings determine where you place your partner in your life because that is first thing you that ever happened. You had feelings for your partner which led both of you to end up together.
So do not let the same person crush your feelings because someone who is inconsiderate and insensitive will never understand how much they hurt someone no matter how you try to show it.
Who does not dream of travelling around the world with their partner? Experiencing new things and having adventures is what keeps you alive and young at heart. If you are afraid of doing something crazy in front of your partner because you are too conscious then he is not the one for you.
Be wild and explore new stuff because that is important to keep you mentally healthy. If your partner is a boring person and wants you to be the same then what’s the fun in dating him or her? If they cannot understand how much you learn from each experience and how important it is for you to explore new things then they are making you fall behind and you will get stuck in the same place for a very long time and your life will get dull and slow.
No matter what happens do not let anyone ever destroy your inner peace. This life is given to you only once and no one has a right to deprive you of your peace. If your partner is fighting with you all the time and there is no real harmony between you two then the relationship is not worth it.
Find someone who lets you have your time and peace and does not create chaos in your life all the time. Take out time for yourself every day and do all those things that make you happy.
Meditate or exercise or just dance if that makes you happy but do it for yourself and if your partner has a problem with that then it is wrong on so many levels. In fact involve your partner in such activities so that they understand the importance of self-peace and let you practice it too.
Do not let anyone challenge your beliefs ever. Your beliefs are what keep you going sanely throughout your life and are the pillars of your whole world. It is not necessary that your partner believes in the same things as you do but they should respect them at least.
Shunning everything you believe in is wrong on their behalf and is super mean because you should never hit someone’s firm ideas that they have grown up with. Maybe they do not like some of your beliefs and get uncomfortable discussing them but if they are important to you then your partner needs to understand that you cannot just stop believing in something.
All you can do is discuss it less in front of them so that they do not get uncomfortable.
Do not forget that you are unique. Your personality is totally different from everybody else and you do not have to change it for anyone because that would mean that you are changing your own core. How would you feel to be living with someone who does not love you for who you actually are?
So if you think that your partner does not like your personality then clearly they do not love you for who you are rather, what you can become for them. In a study it was concluded that people with a strong personality live a happier life than those who break down easily for others. Standing up for yourself is not wrong at any level in fact it shows everyone how firm you can be and they will never mess up with you.
Your partner especially needs to understand the importance of you staying strong and same because that is what they fell in love with in the first place.
Relationships are not all about taking stress and worrying all the time. In fact it is the complete opposite. You fall in love and you just want to be happy and have fun with your partner. if your partner is not having enough fun with you and you are not trying out new things then there is no reason to be in this relationship. you actually let go of all your stress and worries once you are with your partner but if that does not happen then you are just wasting your time. It is true that a relationship is not all fun and games but at least there should be a significant amount of it for both the partners to enjoy each other’s company to the fullest because memories are what is left behind in the end.
After 30 years, you will look back and remember all the happy time that you spent with each other and not the small fights. But if your partner stops you from having all the fun then you will never bother to remember anything from that relationship.
This makes so much sense. Happiness is all that we want from life and if you cannot find happiness from the one person who should give it to you the most then whats the point of dating? You should not jeopardise your happiness in any case because when you are happy you actually want to make everybody else happy else.
So if your partner is asking you to do something that does not make you happy or asks you to abandon something that is the cause of your happiness then just remember that you will find someone much better in your life but the time that got wasted will not come back.
If your partner cannot see you happy then try to involve in what makes you happy and maybe you both will meet somewhere in the middle of the road and it will all get balanced.
Your dreams and goals:
You start dreaming when you are so young and to some extent you live up to your dreams as well. But there are some people out there who keep dreaming and want to implement it all when they find the right person and do it all with them. In that case if you plan to follow your dreams in the presence of your life partner you expect him or her to be supportive.
But if your partner is not supportive enough and tries to manipulate you then you need to think twice before continuing the relationship. Your life goals and dreams are the most important things that determine the kind of person you turn out to be. How can you let go of all that for just person? You should not and if anything hinders you from following your dreams then you need to change your path immediately.
When it comes to stronger commitments like marriage, then of course both the partners do what is best for the family and even if one of them has to abandon some kind of goal or dream that will break the family then they do. But when it comes to some relationship that you are not even sure will have a happy ending then do not leave something you have wanted to do all your life.